Dave (courier_iii) wrote,

Smoke Alarms are Wonderful Devices ... ,

They save lives of course.

The one that's just outside my bedroom doorway is quite intelligent.
It doesn't just go off when I burn the English Muffin.
It actually says, in a very determined feminine voice, "Fire, fire, fire."

Now, as with most such devices, it also knows when its battery is running low, and sounds an alarm for that.
And, in keeping with the rest of the device, it doesn't just chirp, but it actually says in that same sweet voice, "Low battery."
That's sort of nice, except ... ,
When you are sound asleep at 4:00 AM,
... and the first time you hear something subconsciously,
... and, the next time - a minute later - you're saying to yourself, I just heard a voice in the dark,
... and, another minute later you sort of realize that it was saying, "low battery," and then you think about what would say, "low battery," and realize that it must be the smoke alarm.
... And, you sort of roll over and say to yourself, "Maybe I can ignore it, go back to sleep, and take care of it when the alarm clock goes off in a couple of hours."
... And, after five more, "Low batteries," spread over another five minutes you decide that there really is only one solution.
... And, you stagger up, grab a chair from the dining room, just miss your toes when you put it down in the hall, climb up, reach up, twist the thing from its bracket - and the whole thing, bracket and all, comes down from the ceiling with a shower of plaster dust and leaving two holes in the ceiling.
... And, it's still talking to you as you finally do manage to twist the bracket off and extract the battery.

If they can make it that intelligent, why couldn't they also give it a clock so that it would know the time of day and not wake me up?
Or, maybe they did make it intelligent, and I'm paying for the fact that I didn't renew the battery the way that you're supposed to when you change from standard to daylight time or back again.

Did you change yours?

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